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It can be helpful to recognize that Whatever the negatives are, bring them into consciousness and actively think about them when you begin to idealize him. Is there a belief that if you can win him over then you are ultimately worthy of love? No matter what the motivation, use this experience as a way to gain a deeper understanding of yourself. Accepting your situation for what it really is—that what you’re looking for isn’t happening with him—is one you have to process internally.